To all those who mean well, but sound mean…
My beautiful girl is turning 6 in a few weeks. She is off the charts in height and weight – she’s also a great conversationalist… so many people make the honest mistake of thinking she’s older than she is.
She’s been in the 99th percentile since her first year… back then it was only me who had to explain her age compared to her size.
One example stands out to me, and i’m sure you’ll understand why.
It was a beautiful spring day – we were at the park with lots of other littles running around. The moms were standing off to one side when my 18 month old ran over to me and gabbed something only I could understand, we both laughed and she ran back to the slide… one mom gave me a “knowing” look and said – yes, out loud – “That’s what happens when you have children when you’re older.”
I was so shocked at the inference I’m sure my jaw dropped. I said “she’s 18 months old… and who cares if she’s 3 – you don’t say things like that to anyone!”
We left the park.
Now Teagan is getting it first hand… most comments are coming from the right place, wanting to say something kind – but not realizing for her little brain to hear over and over again “you’re so big” “it must be hard to be so tall” “no one’s going to push you around” “you must be the biggest kid in kindergarten” “are you bigger than all the boys?”…. it starts to stick.
She asked me the other day if she’s always going to be a giant. If everyone is always going to tell her “she’s so tall” like she didn’t already know that… my almost 6 year old is already aware she is somehow “different”. Her chin wobbled as her eyes pleaded for me to tell her she was going to be “average”.
She’s been trying to conquer the monkey bars at school. It’s tough when you weigh 60lbs and you can only get 2 rungs along before you fall. And your 40lb friends are hand over hand scampering across.
But she is tenacious. She isn’t giving up. In a week she’s managed to get to 4 rungs… the end goal is in sight.
She’s so proud of being almost there. My tall, strong girl.
So, if you see her on the monkey bars, sweaty-headed trying time and again to do them, please – feel free to encourage her. She loves talking to people – so please chat with her – but remember, their wee brains are sponges and your words will stick with her.
She hears the same comment over and over… and no one is saying it to the kid beside her.
I’m tall. Glenn is tall. It’s a no-brainer T will be tall. But we want her to be proud of her height. To own it. Not to feel it’s something “different” that she should be ashamed of.
Now go, my monkey, go.
monkey achieved her goal yesterday!!!! That’s one tenacious girl see video here: